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Everyone Else Has Had More Sex Than Me (TISM)

Everyone Else Has Had More Sex Than Me

By: TISM

Everyone else has had more sex than me.
Everyone else has had more sex than me.

Everyone else has had more sex than me.
Does anyone else get that feeling?
Teenagers naked,
Couple in threes
Grandparents swing from the ceiling.

Everyone else has had more sex than me.
Everyone else has had more sex than me.

Corporate chambers and office amore.
Shenanigans outdoor and in.
Resist and then later your find out there’s more
Regret in not doing the sin.

Our lives have to die
Of that there’s no help
My favourite way to end them
Is the orb-weaver spider’s whose pedipalp
Enters the female pudendum.

Then dies on the spot
His corpse there still stuck,
Left for his rivals to curse at.
He would rather die than not get to f^ck
Personally I reckon it’s worth it.

Everyone else has had more sex than me.
Does anyone else get that feeling?

Everyone else has had more sex than me.
Does everybody else get that feeling?

Does everyone think…

KATU 2 Trunk Monkey News Report

PORTLAND – If you’ve ever been the victim of road rage on Portland’s freeways you might be able to relate to a new commercial being shot in Portland.

“Jonah” a monkey actor takes the stage in a trunk of a car. In the scenes being shot in Portland he is otherwise known as the Trunk Monkey.

In the commercial, when the driver of the car is victimized by “road rage” the monkey pops the trunk and hops out and starts shaking a crowbar at the offending driver.

The Suburban Auto Group is producing the commercial, which obviously is intended to be a tongue-in-check representation of road rage.

Source: KATU 2 – Portland, Oregon